{Accidentally} Perfect Vegan Cookies

by Holly on March 1, 2011

in dessert,recipes,seriousness,vegan

If you learn just one thing about me, you should probably know I like to be the best.

I don’t like to be wrong.

I don’t like to mess up.

And I most certainly don’t like to lose.

Ask my old figure skating coach what happened in the locker room after I completely bombed my graceless routine to Enya’s “Only Time.” Let’s just say it involved toepicks. Multiple toepicks.

Most of the time, I pretend I don’t realize these deep-seeded psychoses in my Everythingtarian myself and go about my days in perfectionist denial. Then, there come those times when I’m talking to Mama Everythingtarian on the phone, and my extraordinarily patient mother becomes so exasperated with my stubborn self that I see those unflattering glimmers of my personality I prefer to not acknowledge.

Mama E thinks I need to sit back and let things happen. However, she also thinks when I turn 30, she’ll bring me to the sperm bank for a donor so she can finally get her beloved grandchild.

I’m not sure I trust her on either front.

Oh but I do.

I do trust that saint of a woman who birthed me on that fateful December day.

But I also can’t help but think I need to want things to happen. That I can’t just sit back and let things organically unfold as universe sees fit. I need to put time, energy, good juju and the unending depth of my desire into things I want achieve otherwise they won’t happen. I need to want, want, want until I cannot possibly want anymore. Then, it will come.

Even if I still don’t quite know what ‘it’ is.

Needs. Wants. Wants. Needs.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

This all sounds like a total white girl problem, I know.

Apparently, when you want things so badly and want them on your very first try, they are somehow destined not to happen. Mama E says it’s because life is teaching me an important lesson in patience and perseverance. Because I’m a drama queen, I say it’s because the world is out to get me and only me.

Hers is probably more realistic.

Because as it turns out, it is in those accidental moments you forget about wanting and wishing for things that they magically appear.

{Accidentally} Perfect Vegan Cookies

2 T chia seeds
1/4 cup water
1 cup quick oats
1 cup spelt flour
1 t baking soda
1/2 t salt
1 t cinnamon
1 cup turbinado sugar
1 stick Earth Balance or other vegan margarine
1/4 cup coconut oil
1 t vanilla extract
1 (3-oz) bar good-quality vegan chocolate, roughly chopped into small chunks*

*I used Theo’s Gingerbread Spice Bar¬†(not vegan but worth it nonetheless)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

In a small bowl, mix together the chia seeds and water. Set aside.

In a medium bowl, sift flours, soda, salt and cinnamon together. Set aside.

In a large bowl, cream together the chia seed mixture (which should thicken up into a gel after several minutes), sugar, vegan margarine, coconut oil and vanilla. Add in flour mixture 1/2 cup or so at a time, mixing well before adding more. The cookie dough will be slightly thick. Fold in your chopped chocolate.

Place spoonfuls of dough on a baking sheet. Bake for 12 to 15 minutes until lightly golden brown.

Makes 2 dozen cookies


Jess March 1, 2011 at 9:04 pm

Those look heavenlyyyyy!!

Amber March 1, 2011 at 9:10 pm

Those look awesome and toe picks can be such a killer.

Matt @ The Athlete's Plate March 1, 2011 at 9:12 pm

Those look like heaven!

Kristie March 1, 2011 at 9:17 pm

You have extras? I neeeeeeeeed.

courtney March 1, 2011 at 9:19 pm

Holly I love your writing! I love how you weave your humor and literally have me laughing out loud into all of your stories and recipes. Thank you :)

Pure2Raw Twins March 1, 2011 at 9:22 pm

Cookies look great. Mama E has a great life lesson there! One that we could all learn from and hear everyday to help us to remember :)

amanda March 1, 2011 at 9:25 pm

i was a figure skater, too! i knew i liked you!

something about vegan and cookie in the same sentence makes me nervous. haha. but you definitely did a good job at making them look amazinggggg.

J3nn (Jenn's Menu and Lifestyle Blog) March 1, 2011 at 9:25 pm

Lol, I can relate to perfectionism, wanting things the very first try/time, and being impatient. Maybe it’s a december birthday trait!

Those cookies look delish.

Andrea@WellnessNotes March 1, 2011 at 9:33 pm

I used to be obsessed with being perfect. But the older I get, the more I realize there really is no such thing… So I’m glad to report that I’m okay with being “less perfect” now! :)

The cookies look great! And I could never ever bake accidentally perfect cookies. Well, the truth is most of the time I can’t bake even when I really, really try… :)

Rachel @ Grateful Girl Goes Gluten Free March 1, 2011 at 9:58 pm

Those don’t look “accidentally” perfect. they look plain perfect. YUMMM. Also thank you SO much for whitegirlproblem this is going to be my new favorite twitter!

elise March 1, 2011 at 10:18 pm


claire March 1, 2011 at 10:26 pm

Well yes, they do look very perfect to me! I want!

Jessica March 1, 2011 at 10:56 pm

It’s like you knew I was stressed to the max and in need of vegan cookies. This post just saved my life.

Erica D @ Gratitouille March 1, 2011 at 11:07 pm

Funny, I just underwent hours of conversation on the workings of the universe. I’m with your mama ;) Can you send me some of your perfectionism so I can finish my reading for class? Mmk, thanks.

Kaleigh March 1, 2011 at 11:12 pm

Your mom sounds like an amazing woman. So nice too, when you can learn life lessons from cookies :) Trust the cookie!!

janetha @ meals and moves March 1, 2011 at 11:34 pm

hahaha you are extra funny tonight or i am just extra tired. either way, the bit about enya made me giggle. mainly because i had a mental image of you getting upset. i LOVE that theo chocolate! ahh so gingery and good! i miss you.

Ryan @ Aloha Appetite March 1, 2011 at 11:54 pm

Don’t you love when successful accidents happen? Either way, I usually end up eating successes and fails because that’s how frugal I am…

Adam March 2, 2011 at 1:02 am

For the life of me, I do not know how you are single… I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but it mystifies me! You have a great job, you are an excellent writer, you are hilarious, and you own one of the wittiest/humorous blogs around… And you BAKE/COOK! Though you do worry to much! A girl like you doesn’t need to worry about this kind of stuff because when you rock at life in general, everything fits into place at some point or another. You can quote me on this. Just throwing this out there as well: Any leftovers would be much appreciated from your cookie batch. :)

K - Anywhere There's An Airport March 2, 2011 at 2:17 am

I used to ice skate when younger too! I remember skating warm ups to “I saw the sign.” Oh memories!

As for the universe… it’s sometimes hard of hearing… keep putting it out there… it listens eventually! Promise. :)

Averie (LoveVeggiesAndYoga) March 2, 2011 at 5:12 am

they look perfect.

dont you love it when that happens in the kitchen!! that things just TURN out!!

and your comment about the sperm bank…LOL!

Erica March 2, 2011 at 5:35 am

ow! The texture on these babies looks awesome!! I still haven’t tried chia seeds. Glad the experiment turned out fabulous

Lauren March 2, 2011 at 5:45 am

This is one perfect accident!

Lindsay @ Pinch of Yum March 2, 2011 at 6:02 am

Yum! I have never made vegan cookies…. Could today be the day? :)

sofia March 2, 2011 at 6:07 am

true words, lady friend. we must work to make these THINGS, whatever they are, grow organically. then they appear. after the work… and then the apathetic “i don’t care i’ve already put in the work so i’m just gonna let it be and do me” state comes, followed by good. never really thought much about that last step, after the working toward doing ‘n’ stuff, but it totally makes sense. maybe messing up the figure skating routine really did take you on the right path… ;)

wednesday lovvvve,

chelsey @ clean eating chelsey March 2, 2011 at 6:36 am

Loved how you wrote this post – I always plan and want eveything to be perfect too. It’s just part of me. Those cookies look amazing.

Jecka March 2, 2011 at 6:53 am


Also, just remember, not all dark chocolate is vegan. If the ingredients contain anything that says “whey” it’s not vegan.

Some Vegan chocolates include Ghirardelli Semisweet Chocolate (bars, not chips), Trader Joe’s Semisweet Chocolate (I think the chips are vegan, too), among a few others.

brandi March 2, 2011 at 8:30 am

I think I need Mama E’s phone number for when I need a good pep talk :)

These cookies look perfect!

Lindsay @ Summit Sandwiches March 2, 2011 at 9:29 am

If that whole notion about forgetting about wanting and washing things until they suddenly appear could be applied to boys, that would be awesome. Just sayin’…delicious-looking cookies!

my little celebration March 2, 2011 at 10:37 am


Michelle March 2, 2011 at 11:03 am

You’re lucky to have Mama E to hear you out! I totally indentify with the first four lines of your post. If all else fails, at least you’ve got great cookies :-)

Katie March 2, 2011 at 12:40 pm

Confession: I sometimes (well, almost always) cry when recipes DON’T go as well as planned. So when I have an accidental success – I’m over the moon about it. These cookies look like perfection…and a reason to celebrate. :-)

Heather @ Get Healthy with Heather March 2, 2011 at 12:41 pm

What’s wrong with a little perfection? I want some perfect vegan cookies!

Megan (Braise the Roof) March 2, 2011 at 2:41 pm

Oh good lord. I’m coming back to Madison right now. Please save me one.

Tamar March 2, 2011 at 6:47 pm

I think it seems reasonable to quote the rolling stones here: “you can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need.” I guess vegan cookies are what you need until you figure out what you want!

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