Saturday January 16, 2010
4:21am: What the hell is that rattling? Oh my gosh…someone is trying to rob me before kidnapping me and slicing my body into bite-sized pieces! My worst nightmare come true! Wait a second…what is that moaning? NO. WAY. (covers ears) Who the $#*& hell is bumping uglies at four o’clock in the friggin’ morning?!?!
5:21am: (stares at the ceiling) I hate people.
5:45am: (audible stomach grumbles are heard) Peanut butter toast, orange and two cups of coffee will have to suffice as I read blogs and continue on my freelancing writing ON A SATURDAY MORNING AT 6am (!!!).
9:00am: How the hell did I manage to fall asleep for another hour after drinking two cups of coffee?
11:00am: I am going to eat my hand off if I don’t get food soon. Whew! Thankfully, Natalie put together a brunch for all of us co-workers to exchange Christmas gifts and eat to our hearts delight. Oooh, is that a mimosa…?
11:45am: I din’t think I wiked am or murooms, but I am toally diggin’ this egg souffay…(with food in mouth).
12:35pm: (Beverly Hills 90210 playing in background) I had no idea Kelly became addicted to coke, Valerie was inappropriately propositioned by her marketing teacher and Brandon delivered a baby in an elevator? Impressive rich kids.
12:41pm: (tearing off tissue paper) Yesssss…I am now an official GLEEK!
3:47pm: Holly, if you go to the gym, I will let you drive the mile there, and you can just walk on incline today. Okay Holly, fine. You have yourself a deal.
4:34pm: Speed? 3.2 mph. Incline? 12. Time? 45 minutes. TV? Office Space. Check, check, check and check.
5:45pm: Hmmm…what do I want for dinner?
5:45:12pm: I know! I was too lazy forgot to make the Sweet Potato and Parsnip Pancakes earlier this week…
6:15pm: My kitchen sink may be clogged with bits of carrot, parsnip and onion, but these are good. Real good. And vegan too? Terry Walters, dayum girl!
6:31pm: Chocolate…chocolate, where for art thou chocolate?
6:32pm: Come here you lil’ Russian Nutella M&Ms (insert witch cackle here)!
6:33pm: What are the Russkies thinking? Where is my beloved artificial RED 40 and BLUE 1 (scowls)?!?!?!
8:46pm: I’ll just watch Man on Wire before doing the dishes, washing my face and going to bed…
Sunday January 17, 2010
5:30am: What the hell? Why are all the lights on? Why do my teeth feel grimy, and why…
5:31am: Eff. Holly = 0, Watching Movies at Night = 532.
5:32am: Why does the universe make it so hard for me to wake up on-time when I actually need to be at work but then proceed to wake me up two days in a row on the weekend before the sun is up?!?!?!
5:35am: I guess more blog reading, freelance writing and eating breakfast before dawn will have to do. Hmmm…I bet those sweet potato-parsnip latkes from last night would taste great with some cinnamon and maple syrup…
7:31am: Yes, I can finally do something! The co-op is open – GROCERY SHOPPING TIME!!!
8:13am: Thanks you stupid cashier lady for packing one bag with all glass jars + cans while the other one with just produce. Now, I can enjoy the sweet smell of salsa that is currently spilled over EVERYTHING in my bag because it broke due to it being way too heavy. Aren’t you supposed to know how the pack groceries in a GROCERY STORE?!?!?!
8:14am: Holly…breathe. Don’t say what you just thought in your head out loud. Take the replacement salsa and leave.
8:45am: Sweet fruit bowl of love…come to mama!
10:30am: Hmmm…groceries put away, bathroom cleaned, freelance writing making progress, thank you cards in progress, kitchen cleaned, dishes done…wait, it’s only 10:30am?!?!
10:31am: I guess this waking up early thing does have its advantages.
10:45am: (silently following a 25-minute yoga for hamstrings podcast)
11:30am: Is it too early for my third meal of the day already?
11:31am: I totally forgot how awesome divider plates are! Butternut squash + pepperjack cheese + spinach wrap in compartment #1, carrots + homemade cilantro pesto hummus in compartment #2 and curry-roasted cashews in #3! I kinda like feeling like I am eight years old again…
12:49pm: Hmmm…do I really want to hit ‘Publish?’ I might have to actually go to the laundromat and do laundry, much less worry about being committed to a mental institution once readers find out actually how crazy I am.
12:50pm: Maybe a piece of dark chocolate will help delay laundry…
12:57pm: Maybe if I keep having to update my blog timestamps, I won’t ever have to do laundry!
12:58pm: Didn’t I just write a post about making decisions, accepting them and sticking with them?
12:59pm: Yes Holly, yes you did.